Hi guys,
It has been really long time ever since I last updated my blog. It has been a month I guess. Well there are good reasons behind this.
Firstly, I’ve to tell the truth here.... I am very upset about the O-level results that I actually got last Jan. I had never imagined myself getting those horrible scores actually. It is really sad and frustrating. This is one of the reasons why I had no mood to post anything much. What is there to post anyways? There has been nothing, let me repeat NOTHING happening in my life. Everything is not happening to what I always dreamed of. After all these days of not sleeping well, I finally realised why I can’t really get some sleep nowadays. It is basically because I am damn guilty on not placing in my utmost effort on my Os. I could have done more. When I say more here, it means lots more...
Well, I am sad in one side because those marks aren’t mine and I am frustrated because I could and CAN have done better then what I have gotten. From the start I knew that I have not placed any hard effort in my studies. ):
And why is it that I didn’t change my attitude towards my studies... It has only one good reason for it and its called being lazy! I thought people math and science but I had never bothered to study. In the last three months before the Os, I remember that I did push myself hard on Chemistry and Physics. But it was nowhere near my best effort still. As for my math, I was being too overconfidence I guess. I knew that I was just giving myself excuses such as “Oh, I’m feeling so depressed” and all kind of other craps. Now I just feel that I could change everything but it is just too late for my Os.
But there is a reason for everything that happens in my life. I must start my poly life in proper. So many things that I dream off doing in poly and this time round, I don’t care what it is going to take to achieve them. I don’t care even if I am about to give myself a mental stress but if that takes to get what I am dreaming off, so be it. I want to be what I always wanted to be... I had enough of losing things over my laziness just like that. I had not been a strong fighter over this issue before but it is about time to wake up and go for it!
For my friends who are going to do the Os this yr... I am really hoping that you don’t do the same stupid mistake that I have done... 1. Being lazy, 2. Never studied, 3. Never worked for what I wanted but always just sat and wished for it to happen.
That’s all for now...
With the flame of anger to achieve what I want,
Veeknesh (:
